看完了The People in the Trees，无法平静。Holy shit! It's by far the hardest book I've ever read.

这是Hanya Yanagihara的第一部小说。我是看了她的第二部小说A Little Life，久久不能忘怀，于是回过头去补她的旧作的。

虽然才两本书，她的风格已经极其明显。一定会有非常挑战世俗、心理底线的情节，一定会引发有关伦理道德的争论。

但无可争议的是，她的语言功底非常好，捕捉微妙心里变化的能力太强。

A Little Life大概是我做记号最多的书，因为太多的描写惊艳到了我，让我有那种“这个人简直是我肚子里的蛔虫，她怎么可以这么了解我！”的感觉。

我随便摘两个例子。（当初拍了照片放在手机里，无论多少次需要清理空间都舍不得删。）

You won't understand what I mean now, but someday you will: the only trick of friendship, I think, is to find people who are better than you are—not smarter, not cooler, but kinder, and more generous, and more forgiving—and then to appreciate them for what they can teach you, and to try to listen to them when they tell you something about yourself, no matter how bad—or good—it might be, and to trust them, which is the hardest thing of all. But the best, as well.

Lately, he had been wondering if codependence was such a bad thing. He took pleasure in his friendships, and it didn't hurt anyone, so who cared if it was codependent or not? And anyway, how was a friendship any more codependent than a relationship? Why was it admirable when you were twenty-seven but creepy when you were thirty-seven? Why wasn't friendship as good as a relationship? Why wasn't it even better? It was two people who remained together, day after day, bound not by sex or physical attraction or money or children or property, but only by the shared agreement to keep going, the mutual dedication to a union that could never be codified. Friendship was witnessing another's slow drip of miseries, and long bouts of boredom, and occasional triumphs. It was feeling honored by the privilege of getting to be present for another person's most dismal moments, and knowing that you could be dismal around him in return.

其实，仅仅因为这些金句，我都应该五星推荐，但我并没有，因为故事太惨了。看看封面就可以大致感受到。

但恰恰是这本没有打五星的书，让我一直无法忘记。无论后来看了多少书，包括那些我毫不犹豫打了五星的书，都没有这本给我的冲击力大，隔三差五就出现在我脑海里。

于是我去补习了The People in the Trees。

Again, holy shit! It's by far the hardest book I've ever read.

具体情节我就不说了，故事的主角是以诺贝尔奖得主Daniel Carleton Gajdusek为原形虚构出来的。只要搜索一下，你就可以猜到这本书的争议焦点在哪里。

我找到了一个采访的中文翻译版，含轻微剧透，供大家参考作者的创作心态：

當我們可以很輕易地說某人為善、某人為惡時，總會有種滿足感，但這同時也讓我們的思考愈來愈懶惰。人們極少完全為善或為惡，這也是為什麼每個人都如此迷人、難以預測、令人憂心及難以歸類的原因。在佩利納這個角色中，我想創造的是一個因為高成就而讓人景仰，同時又因為其他原因而令人厭惡的人。這種人是最難定論的，強迫我們進入兩難的層面，也令大部分人都感到不安。

我對於男性如何處理性虐待特別感興趣，因為不像女性從小就被教導可能遭遇性方面的危機，男孩從來沒被這樣教導過，但這不意味著他們不會受到虐待。我們的文化不鼓勵男性談論這類性虐待，男性的性虐待多被視為禁忌，帶著獨特的羞恥。

我父親曾告訴我：「所有男人都喜歡跟男人鬼混」，我想他是對的。男性確實喜歡與別的男性相處，但男人間的友誼比起女性具有較嚴峻的邊界。男性相處時會有一種特殊的保守界限及肢體上的僵硬（異性戀尤其如此），這是很有趣的觀察。身為小說家，我可以用更大的自由，去探索這群活在社會規範限制下的族群，及其中的規則儀式。

就我个人而言，Hanya Yanagihara特别有吸引力的一点还在于，她非常低调，私生活方面的信息完全查不到。能搜到的只有：她42岁，尚未结婚，不知道有无固定伴侣，无小孩。

我隐约觉得，她似乎想要永远保持这种神秘感，which is fine by me. :)

还有一点，也让我印象无比深刻。

在The People in the Trees结尾的致谢感言里，有这样一段：

I owe everything to Jared Hohlt, my first and favorite reader (and all-around superior human being), for his kindness, intelligence, patience, wisdom, and dear presence--but I hope he'll settle for my inexpressible and unquantifiable love, thanks, trust, and apologies. Everyone should be so lucky to have such a friend.

在A Little Life结尾的致谢感言里，有这样一段：

Finally and essentially: I not only never could have, but never would have written this book without the conversations with--and the kindness, grace, empathy, forgiveness, and wisdom of--Jared Hohlt, my first and favorite reader, secret keeper, and North Star. His beloved friendship is the greatest gift of my adulthood.

我没有见过比这更让我想献上膝盖的感谢了。It's so beautiful it makes me wanna cry! 要是有朝一日，谁会这样感谢我，我就死而无憾了。Oops, knock on wood...

末了，响应大家号召，列出我的书单。众口难调，我也无谓分等级推荐，只列出最近读完的十本原版书（有我很喜欢的，也有我很不喜欢的）：

The People in the Trees, by Hanya Yanagihara

The Undoing Project, by Michael Lewis

Ferryman, by Claire McFall

The Black Book, by James Patterson

The Honest Truth, by Dan Gemeinhart

Kira-Kira, by Cynthia Kadohata

The Cutthroat, by Clive Cussler and Justin Scott

The Hate U Give, by Angie Thomas

The Kind Worth Killing, by Peter Swanson

Amusing Ourselves to Death, by Neil Postman

欢迎交流！:)